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Here at telephone call from, we do not have an open door policy for arseholes.

 

I offer simple, nice food cooked with love for nice people.

 

Ever thrown a tantrum because you waited a little too long for a glass of wine? Or maybe threw a dummy out of the pram demanding flat bread that wasn’t available? Then keep moving. There are plenty of venues in Noosa that will be happy to pretend that you are the center of the universe. This is not one of them. We do not worship at the alter of all that is you.

 

Here, it's about the food. Not the service, not even the setting. It's the plate of food in front of you.

I'm not trying to sell you a product. Our food will not make you feel like you're sitting on a yacht on the Mediterranean (only sitting on a yacht on the Mediterranean will make you feel like you're sitting on a yacht on the Mediterranean). Our food will not give you epic times with your crew (Only epic.... oh you get the gist). However, our food should make you happy. Make no mistake, I am in the business of selling happiness.

 

So saying that, if for any reason at all the food does not make you happy then please do come and tell me and I will gladly offer a refund. I have no desire to charge for a meal that you did not enjoy. Get a refund, and try something different next time.

If any of this offends etc. that's ok, save us both from each other, keep moving, open your own restaurant and write your own manifesto.

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